No, You're Not Lazy. Here's the Real Reason You’re Not Exercising

When clients first come to me with a goal of exercising more consistently or starting for the first time, they often think their problem is laziness and lack of motivation. These are rarely the barriers.

Think about it, they are high-achieving, driven professionals who have bachelor’s degrees or higher, and are running their own businesses, or are in leadership positions with their companies. Some are running households in addition.

So no, laziness is not their issue. And it’s probably not yours.

Lack of motivation isn’t the issue either. It’s the reason they don’t feel motivated that’s the issue.

Most often, the two primary reasons clients (and maybe you) aren’t able to exercise consistently before working with me are because they:

1) Are shoulding on themselves

2) Adopted a surface-level goal

Stop Shoulding On Yourself

When it comes to workouts, do you think exercise has to look a certain way or last for a certain length of time?

Perhaps you think for it to count, you have to sweat for at least an hour. Or it has to include a trip to the gym or running.

In reality, there are many ways to work out, and depending on the type of workout and your goals, sessions can last between 4 minutes and several hours.

Sometimes, this hurdle comes up for clients because they used to play sports in college or high school. And workouts included hours at the track and lifting weights, for example. After sports, they got out of the habit, decades later are ready to get back into it, but fail to start because the only type of workouts they know are the ones that did in college. They don’t have the time or health for such workouts, and so they either aren’t consistent or don’t start up again at all.

Other times, the client doesn’t have preconceptions from personal experiences but rather from the media. They see influencer posts and news reports on working out and that frames their definition. They don’t enjoy what they’ve tried to emulate and so they don’t keep it up.

There are a few different approaches we take together depending on the client and where their preconceptions are coming from. But the bottom line is we have to redefine exercise.

Does either scenario sound like you? If so, one thing you can do to help yourself redefine exercise is to ask, “Says who?”. The next time you start telling yourself that you “should” exercise a certain way for a certain length of time AND you’re resisting taking action, ask yourself “Says who?”

Then you can explore other ways of moving your body that bring you greater joy. When you find something you love doing, you will look forward to doing it instead of looking for excuses to avoid it.

Surface-Level Goals

Another challenge clients struggle with when adopting a consistent exercise routine is that they set surface-level goals. We all do this. I do this sometimes too.

Your goal might stop at losing 10 pounds before the reunion or wedding. Or getting “toned” so you can look “better” (my vanity goal right now). But are those compelling enough to motivate you when you’re tired and don’t want to work out? When you’re sick of the monotony of the daily grind and want to rebel by skipping?

Probably not. Plus, what happens after the reunion or wedding or after you get toned? Then what?

Instead, peel the layers back by asking yourself why those goals matter. Hint, the core goals will be connected to your core values. For example, you might discover that the real reason you want to drop 10 pounds is that you want to be a role model to your family, and achieving this goal helps you do that.

Or because looking and feeling fit is part of your identity. Or you want it to become part of your identity.

These core-level goals are compelling and will motivate you to move even when you don’t want to.

TLDR

It’s easy to start beating ourselves up and calling ourselves names like lazy or unmotivated. It’s easy to buy into the BS that we are our problem.

You aren’t a problem or the problem. The problem is simply you haven’t been taught how to make exercise fun, and realistically achievable, or tie it to your core values and leverage your strengths.

This is what I help my clients do. If you’re curious about what that looks like for you, book a free strategy call here.