Kids are the only ones going back to school right now. We're going to go back to school too. It's time to unlearn some shit and then learn some new shit so you can upgrade your life.
The first concept to learn is the fact that you can learn pretty much anything. A lot of the things that we think are traits are actually skills. Things like leadership or optimism or creativity or awareness or even drive are often considered traits, some thing that someone is born able to do. In fact they are soft skills that anyone can learn if they want. Since being your own leader and being a manager or vital to excelling as an adult, we will start with those.
How does one become a leader? How does one become a manager? And how can one lead and also manage themselves?
It might surprise you to consider that a leader and a manager are different. Leadership guru Warren Bennis said that “leaders are people who do the right things”, while “managers are people who do things right”. Leaders are charged with the vision, mission, and strategy of the organization/ managers are involved with the short-term focus, how-to execution (Marilyn, 1992).
Looking at your own life consider yourself as the organization. To adult successfully, you have to serve as both leader and manager. So how can you develop these skills? First look at leadership.
The most effective leaders are typically transformational leaders. This means that they empower their followers to become their best selves through inspiration and motivation, role modeling, integrity, a forward-looking vision, adaptability, and innovation.
There are many ways that you can develop the skills for yourself. One way concerning role modeling is to act as if you are already the person you want to be. To determine this, identify others who are practicing the lifestyle you are striving for.
A few ways to improve your adaptability include reframing your relationship with failure; getting comfortable being uncomfortable; and trying new approaches to new and old tasks and challenges. For example, reminding yourself that failure is not the end but rather a learning step along the way. To help with this, identify silver linings and remind yourself that no one is perfect.
As far as improving your management skills, lists and trackers are often the way to go. Identify what needs to happen, break it down into small tasks, track your progress, and don't be afraid to outsource. The best managers know how to delegate.
To help you identify your own version of a leadership and management development course you might consider turning towards a coach and or psychologist. Both in their own ways work to enhance performance. It just so happens that in this case we are talking about life performance, rather than business or sports performance.
You can also turn to online courses through Massive Open Online Courses (MOOCs). Although most may be geared towards a professional environment these are universal soft skills that you can apply to your personal life as well.
Reference
Marilyn Norris. (1992). Warren Bennis on rebuilding leadership. Planning Review, 20(5), 13–15. https://doi-org.lopes.idm.oclc.org/10.1108/eb054370
