Recently, I had my fiberglass paddle board repaired. There was a small ding. The fabulous Chris at Capital SUP gave me a few pointers for properly caring for my board, including regular cleansing and a gentle sanding.
He demonstrated. To this skincare gal, it looked like exfoliation. You sand the board ever so gently on occasion to slough off the build-up, so you get a smoother and faster glide.
Not unlike why we exfoliate our skin—to slough off the build-up so that our products work better, go on smoother, our skin is brighter, and we look younger.
The need for exfoliation doesn’t stop with skin and paddle boards, though. Nature exfoliates, for example, trees exfoliate their bark, and plants “foliate” their leaves. We polish silver to prevent or remove tarnish.
There are countless ways we or nature “exfoliate” by shedding the old to make room for the new, to enhance performance, and improve appearance.
But, as with our skin, we sometimes don’t “exfoliate” or shed as regularly as we should. We allow build-up to, well, build up. This could be with tasks, emotions, unfulfilled hopes, stress, lack of fulfillment…anything that seems to dull your sparkle if you’ll forgive the pun.
The problem is that this build-up will either drag you down so far that you get sick mentally or physically, or both (e.g. burnout), or it will make you explode. Perhaps you lose your temper and take out your pent-up angst on someone completely undeserving. Perhaps you have a “midlife crisis” and move to Europe to paint along a river bank.
The idea, of course, is to prevent the build-up. It’s easy to do this with say your skin or a paddle board. You get the right product, you create the weekly or bi-monthly habit (respectively), and you sparkle.
It’s harder when you’re talking about your whole life. This is because it’s easy to get so wrapped up in the daily routine that we don’t even think about taking a moment to reflect on what we are doing and why, and why we have been doing the routine for so long. We just keep living the same day, day after day. And eventually, the routine becomes a grind, and we no longer feel fulfilled because we are being tarnished, dulled, and buried by the pressures and monotony of it all.
So how do we exfoliate or polish our lives? How do we prevent the build-up?
I’ve written before about the importance of asking why. And it really starts there. Ask yourself why am I doing this, why am I living like this, why this job, this life, this town, this house, etc.
This is called self-reflection. It’s how you “exfoliate” your life. To do this, schedule time weekly or bi-monthly even, to start, to check in with yourself. Ask yourself questions like:
What can I let go of that’s no longer serving me?
What can I learn from this week?
What am I truly feeling right now? (And allow yourself to feel it)
What inspires me?
How can I show myself forgiveness?
How can I show myself appreciation?
Who inspires me? (And tell them)
What might I be taking for granted?
There are countless self-reflection questions, like this. A quick Google search will give you ideas and you can find the prompts that sit best with you in the moment. You don’t need to spend an entire day on this. Even 5 minutes is a great start. Remember, something is better than nothing. You will benefit from a short self-reflection session done consistently than a long session done sporadically.
“Self-reflection is a much kinder teacher than regret is. Prioritize yourself by making a habit of it.” – Andrena Sawyer
“Honest self-understanding liberates us from our stuck emotions.” – C Terry Warner
